ROBERT J.R. GRAHAM: Smoking cessation

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Sunday, 21 September 2014

How To Get Success And Deal With Frustration

by: Rob Bom

It can be very frustrating when you think you have everything you need to succeed, but still not achieving any results. Lots of people quit when things get too complicated or takes too much time. I will give you 3 steps that might help you to still get what you want, without pressing the exit button(quitting)

Most quit as soon as they hit a wall. To get some achievements you will need to break through that wall as this will be the only way to get to the other side. If you are staying behind the wall, you will never see what is behind it.

1. There is no success without failure

Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, if you want to achieve success. There was a commercial a while ago where Michael Jordan talks about all his failures. He missed a million times when he was shooting at the rim, but by practice and focus he got past it and was able to shoot 3 pointers without any problems. Stop, don’t go to youtube yet, read on…

2. Evaluate where you can do better

Don’t focus on what you do wrong, but look at what you could do better. When you have determined what improvements you can make, decide what actions you need to take. Plan them in and and of-course take them!

3. Don’t stress yourself out

One of the major obstacles I ran across was stressing myself out if I could not get something done in one day. I wanted to achieve results so badly that I stressed myself out by doing more and more. However it is not about doing more, it is about doing things smarter. Try to find people that have the results you are looking to get and speak to them. They might give you advise on how to get things done smarter.

Stay positive and you will achieve the results you are looking for. Most are not able to stay positive which leads to failure, quitting. Doing something wrong is not failing, it is self development. Quitting or being feared to do something is failure. Not doing what you need to do will keep you in the same box.

Source

Failure – Why You Should Welcome It

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Before You Quit, Read This!!! the Most Important Factor in Achieving Success in Anything

What is the Primary Reason For Startup Failure?

How your most Epic Fail, can turn into a Legendary Win.

Don’t Quit While You’re Behind

Quitting

Help me address an ethical conflict in an activist group

How My Past Failure Led to My Present Success

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The post How To Get Success And Deal With Frustration appeared first on Robert JR Graham.

Sunday, 31 August 2014

The Science of “Habit Management”

How to Replace Bad Habits with Good Ones: The Science of “Habit Management”

by: Stephen Kraus, Ph.D.

Few things are more difficult than kicking bad habits or developing more positive ones. But it is definitely worth the effort. Bad habits like smoking, overeating or self-criticism shorten lives and lead to underachievement, and unsuccessful attempts to change them lower self- esteem.

In contrast, good habits create a kind of “success auto-pilot,” leading to greater accomplishment with less thought and less effort.

So how do you best eliminate bad habits and create good ones? Research from the new field of “positive psychology” – the scientific study of happy, successful people – points to at least four proven techniques for successful habit management.

1. Replace a bad habit with a good one. Completely eliminating a habit is much harder than replacing it with a more productive habit. Studies of people who compulsively bite their fingernails have shown that it is very difficult for them to completely give up their habit, and much easier for them to substitute biting with the more productive habit of grooming their nails.

Similarly, people who talk too much during meetings struggle to become silent, but find it much easier to replace their compulsive talking with highly attentive listening.

2. Exercise. A habit of regular exercise is obviously important for lasting weight loss. But you may not realize that exercise helps in accomplishing a variety of goals, and in eliminating a number of bad habits.

Frequent exercise helps break habits of overeating, and in kicking all kinds of addictions, particularly if exercise is substituted for an end-of-the-day cocktail or cigarette. Among smokers who become competitive runners, for example, over 80% give up smoking.

3. Reward success. The most fundamental law in all of psychology is the “law of effect.” It simply states that actions followed by rewards are strengthened and likely to recur. Unfortunately, studies show that people rarely use this technique when trying to change personal habits. Dieters, for example, routinely overlook weeks of exercise and restrained eating, only to let a single lapse “snowball” into a total relapse and complete collapse.

Setting up formal or informal rewards for success greatly increases your chances of transforming bad habits into good ones, and is far more effective than punishing yourself for bad habits or setbacks.

4. Schedule your bad habits. If you are really struggling to kick a bad habit, try limiting the habit to a specific time and place. If you are struggling to quit cigarettes, allow yourself to smoke from 9-9:30pm, and only in an uncomfortable “smoking stool.” When the urge to smoke strikes, tell yourself that you’ll have plenty of time to smoke during your pre-scheduled smoking period. Research and case studies confirm that this rather unconventional approach can be a useful first step in changing bad habits.

REFERENCES

The findings and recommendations in this article are based on scientific research published in peer-reviewed journals. For complete references, see Psychological Foundations of Success: A Harvard-Trained Scientist Separates the Science of Success from Self-Help Snake Oil by Stephen Kraus, Ph.D.

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